(Note: This was originally posted as a "note" in my facebook account.)
how is it that every time i need serious medical attention, it always turns out to be a "difficult case"?
first was my bout with typhoid in 1993. i was said to be the first case of an antibiotic-resistant typhoid strain in manila; previous cases had only then been recorded in mandaluyong city, where it so happened that i was working. to make a long story short, my typhoid led me to emit fresh blood in my stool, and for the first 9 days i was in the hospital, "feverless" yet being transfused with blood, befuddling the docs, and subject for their discussion and debate. a collapse in the restroom on the 9th day, and on my dad's birthday no less, led to an exploratory laparotomy, an operation where they cut off around one foot of my small intestine which, my surgeon said, was showing signs of bleeding. then they just sewed up the two ends together. seven days later, i was free to go home, weighing only 75 pounds, with a huge 16-stitch scar running down my belly and 11 bags worth of blood running through my veins.
fast forward to 2011. i am in the women's health center of metropolitan hospital. i am here for a fertility work-up which i have been undergoing for how many years, under different OBs in different hospitals, since i've been married for 8 years and still with no kids to show as proof. :-) this time i am ready to undergo intrauterine insemination. prior to this day, i had been taking a combined fertility regimen of clomene for 5 days, and 3 shots of puregon on alternating days. i had also been undergoing transvaginal ultrasound so they could monitor my follicles and my uterine lining.
on day 1 of my ultrasound (day 10 of my cycle) i caught the sound of worry from my OB (a reproductive endocrinologist) that my lining wasn't thick enough. this fact is important because the lining needs to be thick enough for a fertilized ovum to implant and become a baby. but then, the ultrasound had been done prior to my puregon (estrogen) shot. ditto on day 2 (day 12 of my cycle), although the lining had thickened a bit. by this time i had partially shifted to a diet of soy milk, wheat bread, wheat cereal, apples since i had read on the internet that these were estrogen-rich foods. i had to reduce my white rice intake too. anyway, my OB also said that we could push through with the IUI on day 14 of my cycle because the thickening rate of the lining was going fine enough, and i already had mature follicles.
so this is day 3 of my ultrasound, or day 14 of my cycle. pank and i are early at the hospital. while waiting for the doctor, i ask pank to accompany me to the nearby chapel and pray. there, i see an image of sta. clara. sta. clara, sta. clara! we had danced in obando a few years ago... quite an experience! but we had not gone since... i stand up and touch her image and in my heart offer a small prayer seeking her help. beside her, so propitiously i think, stands an image of st. jude thaddeus -- our parish and personal patron! i touch him and offer a small prayer too.
back we go to the hospital for my ultrasound. my OB says my uterine lining is thick enough (the estrogen-rich foods could have worked!) also, one of the mature follicles is starting to decrease in size and there is already a little fluid in my cul-de-sac. she reassures me that it's fine, it means she wouldn't have to inject me with pregnyl for my follicle to rupture, saving me money. :-) but since it is about lunch time, she advises us to have lunch first, and return for pank to be able to provide his seed (environment-friendly ang term, palibhasa taga-DENR hahaha).
we have a hearty lunch at nearby shakey's.. i try their shirley temple (lemon soda with cherry syrup) and i like its bubbly taste, perfect for the saltiness of my bunch of lunch. then we go back to the hospital to nap at the plush leatherette-covered cushions of the sofas in the empty 5th floor lobby. at the appointed time, pank goes on exile to that mysterious room assigned for men... hahaha... and he emerges a few minutes later (ang bilis?!). he hands over his "produce" for semenalysis and for washing (when they prepare sperm for better chances of survival and fertilization, removing the "bad quality" sperm). this would, we had been told, take some time.
so we wait.
it is past 5pm. the nurse calls me and hands me the washed sperm in a small tube. she tapes the tube to my upper chest, telling me to cover it with my palm because it would need body heat. a bit later, my OB arrives with another female OB in tow. then they tell me to lie down and spread my legs, of course, and proceed to prod and poke into my nethers. (archaic ang dating, hehe..)
my husband and i are a bit worried when we hear the docs muttering how they are having a bit of difficulty because of how my cervix is positioned, added to the fact that i have a retroverted uterus. the catheter, soft as it is, is finding "resistance" and can not be easily pushed or guided into my uterus. they even need a hysterometer so they can better see how to guide the catheter in. by this time i am finding it uncomfortable, not really painful (i guess it's because of my high level of pain tolerance), while the docs ask time and again for this and that tool or whatever medical instrument or aid from the nurse.i distract myself from the discomfort by reciting Psalm 23, which has never ceased to calm me every time i utter it, and by trying to read what is written in the lights overhead. from time to time i glance at my patiently waiting husband, who is standing beside me, and i smile to reassure him that i am okay even though it is as if i could feel that my tummy is being rearranged. uncomfortable, really.
i also think of how my mom once joked that it's just like what people do to breed pigs.. and i think, man, what an expensive way to have a kid... how impersonal, how clinical.. where's the sense of enjoying the act of making babies? haha. congress is debating about the RH bill and controlling the country's population.. fetuses are found stashed somewhere, babies are literally thrown away.. and here i am, with my legs spread and not enjoying it (oops.. censored!) just to have a baby!
some 25-30 minutes later (in what was supposed to be a 15-20 minute procedure) they finally say it is done... my OB is sweating, considering that the room's air conditioning has been turned up. but i have to remain lying down with a pillow under my butt for about 15 minutes more while my hubby settles the bill and arranges our things.
while the nurse cleans up the used medical aids, we chat.. she wishes me luck because two previous IUI patients had not had any... one was in her 30s, the other in her 40s... and i'm 39! she wishes i would break the chain, especially since i have an attentive husband who had gone through the whole preparation and procedure with me. the two previous patients were both married to seafarers, and had limited time for the whole thing. disheartening though the news is, i am determined to stay positive. she says one of the patients wants to dance at the obando fiesta, and we say that we had danced there before and were not able to return.
it is almost 7 pm. kami na ang nagsara ng women's health center sa aming pag-alis.(its office hours are at 9am-6pm.) luckily, at a hospital where hailing a taxicab is so difficult, one comes cruising in to let off some hospital visitors. we jump in. well, not literally, since i have to be reaalllly careful with my movements.
in the cab on the way home, we realize... it's may 18th. our wedding date is dec. 18th. what a nice date! how we pray that even though this is my first time to undergo the procedure, i would not have to repeat it (they say patients are given 2-3 maximum IUI procedures, and with no success, are then advised to try IVF.) i hope i have beginner's luck! first time lucky!
but i know, lucky actually means God willed it. and the clincher, because we realize it only as we reach home and sit down for dinner: may 18th is the feast day of sta. clara of obando, patron of those who request for a mate, or to bear children, especially female! and i had touched her statue that morning, and talked about the fiesta with the nurse, without realizing it!
♫ ♫
"Santa Clarang pinong-pino / Ako po ay bigyan mo / Ng asawang labintatlo / Sa gastos 'di magreklamo!"
"Santa Clarang pinong-pino / Ang pangako ko ay ganito / Pagdating ko sa Obando / Sasayaw ako ng pandanggo."
♫♫
